Recognising and dealing with different emotions

You may experience a range of emotions as a result of having cancer.  Throughout treatment and after treatment, your emotions and feelings can change. It is important to recognise these emotions and seek support with them if you feel they are affecting your day-to-day life.  Talking to family, friends or other people affected by cancer may help.  Your healthcare team can also give you support. You may feel you need more help and your specialist nurse, doctor or GP can refer you to psychologist or counsellor.

The following video features a head and neck cancer survivor talking about his experience and offering some advice based on his personal experience:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/loB8_3a_JpEBfXqFCsHDjPPHU6LSslfABF4_pWj0ZQn9K2i_pAkv-1bZYno5cyjj.GFFPVoOjhdz4XfeJ 

The following link has information on coping with cancer emotions.

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/treatment/coping-with-treatment/cancer-and-your-emotions

Changes in how you look

People who have undergone treatment for head and neck cancer may see changes to their appearance. Sometimes, these changes are temporary but in some cases, they are more significant and permanent. These changes can affect the way you think and feel about your body. This is called body image. It can takes time to adjust to these changes.   The changes can also be a reminder of the cancer and treatment.  It is important not to avoid looking at yourself and to get emotional support from those around you, including your cancer team.

If you are finding it hard to go out and see people, start with something small like going for a walk with someone close to you. You can then try to build this up.  It can be helpful to think through how you might deal with certain situations in advance, such as meeting people who ask about the change in how you speak or look.  How much you say will depend on the situation.  Changing Faces has information about ways to improve your confidence when meeting people (insert link Changing Faces | Visible Difference & Disfigurement Charity). This may help you to cope with other people’s reactions. You might also find the following link helpful on dealing with concerns you may have about body image: https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/stories-and-media/booklets/body-image-and-cancer

Intimate Relationships

Cancer and treatment can change the dynamic of a relationship as roles and responsibilities may change. Some couples become closer as a result of experiencing cancer. On the other hand, cancer can put a lot of strain on a relationship.  It’s not uncommon for people to find it difficult to talk about their feelings and this can make communication as a couple difficult.  Also, the effects of cancer and its treatment can affect the way you feel about yourself sexually and your ability to enjoy sex. Tiredness during and after treatment can also make you lose interest in sex. After treatment, you may not enjoy kissing the way you used to. If you have a partner, they may also need time to adjust. In this section we have included a self-management e-resource https://talkingaboutsex-cancercare.org  that may help you. You can also talk to your cancer team or GP if you feel you need additional support.

Where can I find support?

There are a number of organisations offering support and advice:

Northern Ireland Cancer Network provides information on clinical support services and a range of other support services.
www.nican.hscni.net/livingwithandbeyondcancer 

Macmillan Cancer Support  is a cancer support organisation that recognises how cancer can affect your life in many ways. They offer support, information and advice online and face to face.
https://www.macmillan.org.uk

Cancer Focus NI focuses on the needs of people in Northern Ireland. They provide care and support services for cancer patients and their families.
https://cancerfocusni.org

 Action Cancer supports people through cancer awareness, prevention, detection and support.
https://actioncancer.org

Swallows is a nationwide Head and Neck Cancer Charity. They focus on supporting people with swallowing difficulties. It was formed by head and neck cancer patients to help and support patients and their carers.
www.theswallows.org.uk

Irish Cancer Society: https://www.cancer.ie is made up of patients, survivors, volunteers, supporters, health and social care professionals and researchers. They provide advocacy, support services and research for people affected by cancer, including head and neck cancer.

British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy website provides information on therapist who can offer counselling online, via telephone or face to face.
www.bacp.co.uk

Carers NI is part of Carers UK. They provide expert advice, information and support, and can we connect carers with each other. While there is nothing specific to head and neck cancer, cancer support and information is included.
www.carersuk.org