GUEST BLOG: Megan’s Breastfeeding Journey

7th August 2025
Megan And Caila

It is World Breastfeeding Week and I’m right in the thick of my second breastfeeding journey with a scrumptious little newborn. My first experience was filled with challenges – tongue ties, weight loss, mastitis and low supply. But we pushed through. Through sheer will and determination, we eventually managed to breastfeed exclusively and now, 2.5 years later and thanks to the support of our group & the trust, we’re even tandem feeding.

During that first journey, I trained as a peer supporter volunteer for the Trust and started attending a breastfeeding support group weekly to help other mums navigate their own paths. I encountered just about every feeding issue you could imagine and overcame them all. So, I naively assumed that breastfeeding my third baby would be smooth sailing – I thought I had enough knowledge to handle anything.

Then came her day 7 weigh-in: a gain of just 20g.

“They’ll want to see you up in the Ulster,” said the midwife.

My heart sank.

All I could think was, not again.

It’s a strange thing when birth or feeding doesn’t go to plan. Logically, I know it doesn’t make me any less of a mum, but that didn’t stop the wave of failure that washed over me. My body had let me down again. Why couldn’t it nourish my babies when that’s what it was supposed to do?

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding… I know that, you know that and my clever, cheeky, formula fed 7-year-old son definitely knows that. But he was formula fed because I CHOSE that. This time, it wasn’t a choice. I didn’t choose to have low supply. I felt betrayed by my own body.

I sobbed in the arms of the infant feeding specialist who told me we’d need to introduce formula top-ups. I sobbed in the car on the way to Sainsbury’s to buy those little bottles that felt like symbols of failure. I sobbed in the kitchen as I sterilised her bottle for her first feed.

I couldn’t explain to my partner or even to myself  why I was so devastated. I knew the words to say. I’ve said them to countless other mums, ‘formula is a brilliant tool when your baby needs to gain weight and you need time to build your supply’. I knew everything I needed to hear, but somehow saying it to myself didn’t help. I felt like an imposter.

How can I support other mums through their struggles when I can’t even feed my own baby?

I became obsessed with finding a reason for my low supply. I spent hours pumping, researching insulin resistance, PCOS, insufficient glandular tissue. I trawled through old WhatsApp messages, trying to find clues about how long Cora needed top-ups. I was spiralling.

But then something shifted.

I started expressing enough milk for full feeds.

Her weight gain became consistent.

And finally, I could breathe.

That’s when it hit me, I am breastfeeding. Even if there’s the occasional bottle of formula involved, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. This journey is mine and every bump in the road just gives me more experience to help others.

Motherhood is hard. It’s isolating and we put so much pressure on ourselves to get everything right that we sometimes forget to be in the moment. I was so busy booking blood tests for suspected hyperthyroidism that I almost forgot to stop and enjoy her at her tiniest.

REMEBER, your breastfeeding journey is your own.

Don’t compare yourself to the mum on TikTok who pumps 26 ounces in the morning and makes it look effortless. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. Breastfeeding is a valid choice. Combo feeding is a valid choice. Formula feeding is a valid choice. You have to do what works, not just for your baby, but for you.

Happy Breastfeeding Week.

Lots of love from me, Caila and our bedtime bottles of formula.